(no subject)

[tylik]

Because I'm not feeling well, and answering memes counts as a quiet activity.

1) Single, Taken, or Crushing?
None quite seem to apply. I have a primary relationship with my work. It's not utterly exclusive, but it doesn't work for most people. I have a couple of relationships with people, too.

2) Are you happy with where you are?
I'm happy. I have a great life. Not a perfect life, though, and there are things I will try to change should I manufacture the opportunity.

3) When you meet the right person, would you fall fast?
The last few times I've gotten seriously involved, I was aware of potential almost from the first, but not only did I make things progress slowly, was I was arguably also in denial. Which may or may not be relevant to "falling".

4) Have you ever had your heart broken?
My heart has broken. Was it done to me, or did I do it to myself? I have been disappointed, and I have had promises broken.
My heart, as it turns out, is fairly resilient, and seems to pull itself back into its rather battered and disreputable shape fairly well. It's probably not my best part.

5) Do you believe that there are certain circumstances where cheating is okay?
Maybe there are some semantic questions here that I'm not getting, but to me cheating is kind of not okay by definition. There are times when it might be easier to have compassion for someone who has been cheating.

6) Would you ever take someone back if they cheated on you?
I have before. I would be slower to again, but I might if I thought there was a realistic chance of resolving the underlying problems. (Mistakes don't particularly bother me. But fundemental unreliability does. I hope I can tell the difference, but will still probably tend to give people the benefit of the doubt.)

7) Have you talked about marriage with another person?
I've talked about marriage with many people. I've probably published some of the thoughts on marriage.
I have talked with two people (that I can think of, right off) about specifically marrying them, one of whom I married and am still married too, if mostly at this point technically.

8) Do you want children?
I enjoy children, and like having children in my life. In some sense I want children of my own -- though even then not necessarily of my body -- but it lags behind quite a few other things that I want, and I expect that barring longevity treatments it will not happen. And in many ways I think I make a better teacher than I would a parent.

9) How many?
Of my body? None, probably. Maybe one under circumstances I have trouble seeing occurring before the expiry date on my fertility. Of mine, in some other sense? Er... that would really depend on my partners. (Note the plural. I think I would want a minimum of two co parents before I tried raising kids.) As students, proteges, friends, etc? Many.

10) Would you consider adoption?
Yep. Probably foreign.

11) If somebody liked you right now, what do you think is a cool way to let you know?
In theory, I'd like people to tell me, if in a non pressure sort of way. In practice, at the moment, I'm busy enough with life in general that trying to spend a bit of time with me and kind of ease into the notion first is probably more workable. Really, I think most people ought not date me.

12) Do you enjoy playing hard to get?
I don't think there is any playing involved. When I've had the time and energy, I'm usually pretty forthright about being interested, if the notion ever occurs to me.
I do like to flirt, and enjoy flirting with people who aren't likely to want to take things further.

13) Do you want someone you can't have?
I don't think so. If I had a detailed list of who I could and couldn't have it would be an easier question to answer.

14) Do you believe love at first sight exists?
I don't pretend to understand love enough to make that call. The word seems to mean different things to different people.
Sometimes I've met people wherein it was immediately obvious that there was a lot of room for us to become close... often this is an intellectual kind of closeness. (Intellectual closeness seems to be more likely to translate into romantic feeling for me than for most. Luckily I rarely pine.) I certainly can't make an arguement against the existance of love at first sight, though it doesn't seem like something on its own that one would want to base a relationship on.

15) Do you believe in celebrating anniversaries?
Eh. Some of them I notice. If my partner seems to care, I will, though people who make big fusses about such things are generally likely to annoy me.

16) Do you believe that you can change someone?
I don't believe that I can look at someone, decide I really like them except for some list of problems, and then edit them to better meet my tastes. Or even their tastes.
But people do change. I've often seen people change while they are in relationships with me, and sometimes I think the relationship is pretty obviously part of the change. And people have changed me. I want people to change me, even.
Sometimes I have a catalytic effect on people. It's... strange. Occaisionally kind of neat, mostly mystifying, sometimes deeply disturbing. And sometimes I think I just make a good screen for people to project upon. I've been given credit for the most amazing things (and I'm not necessarily talking about good things).

17) If you could get married anywhere, money's not an object?
Even interpreting "marriage" loosely, it would have to be something very particular to that relationship. Since I am not in a relationship currently moving in such a direction, I don't have enough information to really say.
...though actually, some place up in mountains with just the individual(s) in question (which would not be marriage as it is commonly posited) does pop into my mind... and the graduate reading room at Suzallo is quite nice.

18) Do you have feelings for someone right now?
My god, the euphemisms. I have all kinds of feelings for all kinds of people. Even narrowing the scope of "feelings", there are a number of people I enjoy being close to, a few I'd like to be closer to, a couple who I lust after to some degree, at least a couple who I think I would at least try to start something with could I figure out where to find the time and energy.

19) Have you ever wished you could've had someone but you couldn't?
Oh, a bit. Not really that seriously, though -- even my longest held crush from my teenage years and I eventually ended up in bed.

20) Have you ever broken a heart?
I don't know. I mean both that I don't know if people's heart have been broken in the course of their relationships with me, nor whether I did the break if the former did happen.

21) Would you ever fight someone over your significant other?
If the implication is a romantic rivalry, no. If someone wants to be my partner, they should be my partner. If they have doubts, or feel conflicted, I'm willing to talk about it (and am generally open to sharing) but I don't think people are prizes to be won. And I guess I consider it beneath my dignity to fight over someone, too.
If someone is threatening a partner, that's a different matter. Heck, in that case it doesn't have to be a partner.